grieving and manic phase

its been more than month since my bf broke up with me. i was absent from blogging as i needed my time.done really bad harms to my self.but now i have learnt to live with it i guess or i am still grieving but my own way.

anyhow talking about past wont bring anything .so the new improvement is even i have taken 12 sleeping pills and still cant sleep.crawled in bed for 2 hours but now i’m back on computer. the energy rush i can feel is the sign i am getting into manic phase which is always fun but i am scared if slipped to hyper manic then it wouldnt be good. as i always end up doing bad things.

bad thinks like shopping online and wasting money of things that i dont need and regret them once the phase is after this i always slips into super depressive phase which bring only destruction to like harming self and crying all the time.

hope this wont be that bumpy ride this time and the meds will control me out.


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